Patriarchy #atozblogchallenge

Patriarchy is the idea that families and societies are ruled by fathers, grandfathers and males. 

In marriages and families, the wife and the children assume the name of the husband and father. Earlier in our own American history, if you were a woman, you would not have even been allowed to own property. Your father or your husband would own the property and you would pretty much be at their mercy. Daughters were usually a burden. If they could not be married off, they would become a drain on the family. Daughters were a liability rather than an asset. Sons, however, were a blessing. They could work. They could become apprentices. They could own businesses. They could take over the family business. And if something happened to the father, the mother and any unmarried daughters would became the responsibility of the brothers... at best.

I'm in a bit of a transition. Personally. 

I'm close to the point where I can legally resume my maiden name. The name that I assumed as a younger woman, the name that belonged to my husband, I can legally divest myself of it. But for what purpose? At that point, I become my father's daughter again, because the name I would go back to belongs to my father. 

I considered assuming my mothers maiden name. But her name belonged to her father. I don't know why this makes me so angry... maybe because I feel like, as women, we have never owned ourselves. I will never have the option of reclaiming the identity of my matriarchs. My grandmother, my great-grandmother... all their names belonged to husbands or fathers. I don't even know how to reclaim their identity.

Patriarchy named me Lail. Then it named me Caldwell.

Now what?